When life’s biggest dilemmas strike at the most inconvenient times!
Note:
This is just a fun take on a weird phobia I have - no insensitiveness intended!
Natural disasters are terrifying enough - but imagine getting caught in one when you’re, well, awkwardly exposed.
It’s one of those bizarre fears that pops into my mind sometimes: what if a calamity strikes when I’m, you know, minding my own business?
First - it is the immense pressure of survival - but then it’s not just that; it’s about the horror of doing it in your underwear (or worse, completely exposed!).
Picture a train wreck or an earthquake hitting while you’re in the bathroom, and then the rescue team finds you - in that state.
Or running from a fire with no time to pull on your pants!
When my nightmare came true
It was a bright sunny morning, and I was sipping my coffee, being grateful to be able to work from home. My daughter was only a few months old then.
After a satisfying morning coffee, the next natural step was a call from my locomotive (bathroom break, duh!).
With my workday lined up and ready to be productive, I decided it was time to answer nature’s call.
I live on the 1st floor, where the creative architecture seems to amplify even the tiniest of the noises. My bathroom window opens into a duct, and directly below are the building's electrical units.
While I was sitting on the throne casually scrolling through my phone, I suddenly heard a loud bang (no, not from me!). I was confused about what might have happened but decided to ignore it and get back to work.
Within seconds, there was an even louder bang - followed by another. That’s when I knew something was really wrong. I heard the watchman shouting about a fire. It turned out the electrical unit of the building had caught fire.
By this time chaos had reigned, and quite a few people were out of their homes - screaming and running through the stairs. The watchman was joined by a few other folks, trying to get the fire in control.
People from the upper floors began rushing down to evacuate the building. The duct was plummeted with thick black smoke, some of which had started entering the washroom window.
My mom kept calling me from outside, and as usual I was taking my own sweet time.
With no time to wait, she quickly grabbed the cat, placed him in his basket, and made her way to the ground floor.
Meanwhile, my wife picked my daughter and rushed out of the house too.
I wanted to leave too, but I was vulnerable and restricted in that moment.
I thought to myself, "Wait, I think you all left a trooper behind."
The whole "leave no man behind" thing suddenly felt like a movie cliché.
Then it hit me:
"So this is it - this is how my life ends, in a bathroom."
I was almost certain of it.
But I decided to give a fight - this couldn't be how it ends.
With one final push, I finished my business. I rushed out of the bathroom, then quickly made my way out of the house.
I dreaded about what I would find on the ground floor, but it was a huge relief to learn that the fire was contained quickly, with no damage to anyone or any vehicles.
And then it occurred to me - "Did I flush?"
Moral of the story:
Priorities matter. Focus on what matters to you the most, and let the world burn.
[Just kidding - It is preferable to shit in your pants, than gamble with your life.]
P.S
I have a super family and they would never leave me alone during difficult times (otherwise!).
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